Because I’m all about adventure, I found myself in Wal Mart over the weekend seeking emergency milk and maple syrup supplies. Since we don’t spend nearly enough time together as a family, we went en masse. We did have the good sense to employ the divide and conquer method of shopping. I had my girls with me. With their long gazelle like legs, they are able to keep emergency-shopping pace with my short stubby legs.
I was moving rather quickly (even for me) to procure the emergency supplies and whizzed down the cereal aisle. I passed an upper middle aged couple on my left. I say upper because since I’m what might be considered middle aged, and these people were likely my age, but looked like they lived closer to the wild side than I have.
As we came closer to the duo, I noticed smoke ascending from the woman’s nostrils and mouth. A good amount of smoke. And since I hadn’t smelled the unmistakeable scent of cigarette (I have heightened olfactory senses, a gift that keeps on giving), I could only assume that this woman was about to spontaneously combust. Right there on aisle 9. A decision needed to be made. Either I could scream FIRE and make for the nearest emergency exit, OR I could throw my jacket over her head as I tackle her, giving clear instruction STOP, DROP, AND ROLL WOMAN!
Just as I was about to act, my daughter whispered, “MOM, that woman is smoking and is HIDING a cigarette.” So astute they are at that age. Sure enough, she was hiding a cig in her sleeve. Then I had another decision to make. Should I stop and lecture this woman on the dangers of smoking, and smoking IN THE CEREAL AISLE at that? I mean, this is a retirement community. There are elderly folks on Wal Mart scooters packing oxygen and THEY ARE NOT VERY GOOD DRIVERS.
Or. I could scurry off and find the nearest Wal Mart associate to tattle.
I did neither, due to my non-confrontive nature. And my irrational fear of getting beat up by a biker dude and his smokey lady friend.
Seriously. Smoking in Wal Mart. I am kicking myself for not always having my camera readied for weekend trips to Wal Mart. For this reason alone. (Warning: site can contain inappropriate material. You know how I feel about THAT.)
Oddest thing you’ve ever encountered in Wal Mart?
{ 9 comments }
WalMart is an adventure all by itself, no need for vacation-just shop there!
I’ve seen people smoking at Walmart. I just tell them, “you can’t smoke in here”. Living on the wild side I am!
Around here we call them “walmartians” and for good reasons. Just reference the site you put the link to.
LOL!
One never knows what one will encounter on a simple emergency trip to WalMart. (and really, aren’t they all emergency trips?)
If you didn’t smell smoke it was likely an electronic cigarette. I don’t know what’s actually in them so I can’t say they’re not dangerous to the general public, but that would be my guess.
During our latest “emergency” trip to Walmart, the woman paying in front of us dumped out the contents of her “purse” (a plastic bag from Target, ironically) onto the belt to find her money. No wallet. Seriously. All the contents of a purse in this plastic bag. Lipstick, cell phone, gum, money… What was she buying? NOT a purse! I did not/do not get it…
I make it a policy, while in Walmart, to keep my eyes focused on my cart and the immediate area ahead of my cart. I get what needs to be got and leave fast.
Praying for you through the storm. Just saying. Hang on tight.
I have written waaay too many blog posts about the things I have encountered at wally world. I stopped counting how many times I’ve had to use the cart to shove my spawn down a different aisle before they said something that would possibly get us killed. Things like hey mister! your skirt is too short for this kind of weather.
They are my children after all, but God help them, they have my snarky sense of humor with not much of a filter either.
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