Years ago, especially as a card carrying member of the Screen Actors Guild, I was an avid movie goer. SAG had a program, which for a nominal yearly fee, allowed members to view new releases (plus an occasional classic re-release) with other SAG members. It was always a respectful audience, with everyone staying until every last credit rolled.
On those rare occasions that I actually get to a real theatre nowadays, we still stay until every last stinking credit rolls. Every once in a while we’ll see old friends names either in the cast or the crew. That is a delight. And almost worth the price of admission. Almost.
Now the majority of my movie viewing is done from the sanctity of my barkolounger. And I have to rely on outside sources to alert me as to which movies are worth seeing. One of my favorite resources is Christianity Todays online “best of” archives. And when I find a movie that I want to watch, I order it from the library. Sometimes it takes a while. For example, many months ago, I requested “Crazy Heart.” Because I’m a sucker for a down on his luck country singer kind of movie (this was not a pick by Christianity Today, btw). I was something like #78 in line at our library. When it finally came in, I must say that I didn’t care for it. I just kept wanting Jeff Bridges to shower. And brush his teeth. And eat better. Proving once again that I really am 94.
The other day, I was perusing my Facebook friends stream, and happened upon a post by a girlfriend of mine who was talking about Russell Brand, and how funny he was on Conan O’Brian. Frankly, whenever I’ve seen photos of him, he frightens me, but I must say that when I recently caught a snippet of a talk show he was on, I did think that he was funny.
Well, the comments that followed agreed that he was hysterical, and recommended that my friend see the movie “Forgetting Sarah Marshall”. And then I think one more of her friends seconded that idea.
I’ve had a few rough days, what with all the hacking, vomit, and general BAD MOODS in this house due to high fevers. I could use a good laugh. So I put a hold on “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” at our intrepid library.
It came in the next day. This should have been a clue.
I arrived at the library with all 3 children and my rolling cart, so that I could fill it with the 24 books that I had on hold for this next semester of school. Our hold pile also included 2 Backyardigans DVDs and “Forgetting Sarah Marshall”.
That night after safely tucking everyone into bed, I popped the movie into the DVD. My reading glasses were characteristically missing, so I did not read the synopsis of the movie. But I did note that it said “NOT RATED” in large print. Interesting.
Three minutes into the movie, I was witness to full frontal male nudity. I gasped. And this was just as Fiddledaddy wandered through the room. “Um, WHAT ARE YOU WATCHING?”
Well. Because I did not have the benefit of my glasses, I could not find the STOP button on the remote. SO ALL THE NUDITY CONTINUED. Sweating profusely, I was so flustered I pressed PAUSE. And in my head I was all JUST MAKE IT STOP, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND RIGHT, MAKE IT STOP!
Finally, I was able to extricate the offending disc from the DVD player. The same DVD player that is home to The Sound of Music, The Backyardigans, and Blues Clues.
I had to explain to Fiddledaddy why I happened upon a film such as the one I was almost watching. “You picked it up from the library? With my children in attendance?” I nodded miserably. The headline that ran through my head: Little middle aged Christian homeschooling mom watches p*** in her spare time.
And if you’ve seen the movie, and think it’s brilliant, I do not stand in judgment. Somewhere in the last 15 years of my life, I have morphed into someone that needs to be careful what I watch and listen to. That’s just the way I roll now.
I have decided that I will be returning the film under the cloak of darkness, dropping it into the metal book slot, after library business hours.
And I will likely stick a little bit closer to Christianity Todays online picks for my movie viewing. But, just in case I run out of options, and knowing what you know about me, do you all have any recommendations for more wholesome type comedies?