Escaping the House of Horrors

As I was anxiously awaiting the final episode of Lost, I decided to prepare canned Ravioli for my children for dinner.

Because I’m an excellent mother with superior culinary skills.

My thoughts must have been elsewhere, because I sliced my thumb open on the lid.  And by sliced, I mean that I no longer have a thumb print.

After grossing the children out with all the kitchen carnage, I wrapped the offending thumb up in a Viva Paper Tower (for extra absorbency) and went to show Fiddledaddy.

“Well.  When does Urgent Care close?” Like he doesn’t know that by heart.  “It’s closed.” That would have been our second adventure to Urgent Care in a week.  Which I’ll get to in a minute.

The emergency room was out of the question, since it would have interfered with the last episode of Lost.  I decided that in the spirit of the Lost finale, I would ask Fiddledaddy to stitch me up with my sewing kit.  Using basic black.

He declined.

Undaunted, I headed for a box of flesh colored Nexcare bandages.  Which have done a minimally adequate job of keeping me from bleeding out.  As luck would have it, I use my thumbs A LOT, which means that I keep re-opening the wound.  But whatever, I can get by with one thumb.

I really don’t think I can take any more impromptu medical emergencies.  A couple of weeks ago, Cailey ended up in the E.R. with an infected cyst on her thyroid gland.  To keep you up to speed, she finished her round of antibiotics and the swelling and redness subsided dramatically.

But.  Yesterday, the day after finishing her meds, the lump re-appeared along with a fever.  We spoke with her doctor this morning and he wants to put her on another round of antibiotics, and we’ll see him next week to determine if/when the cyst needs to be removed.

At the beginning of this last week, Emme woke up with a 105 degree fever.  I got it down to 103 with Tylenol, but didn’t want to take any chances.  So we aimed the van toward Urgent Care.  Where everyone knows our name.  She had a nasty ear infection.  Caused by her inability to BLOW HER NOSE.

When she saw her Pediatrician yesterday, she received a stern warning to BLOW HER NOSE instead of ALL THE SNIFFING.  I pretty sure she’s learned her lesson.  I’ve assured her that contrary to popular belief, she will not lose valuable brain cells by blowing her nose.

A round of antibiotics for her followed.

Before anything else happens, I’m packing.  Seriously. And heading over to Orlando for the annual FPEA Homeschool Convention.  I CANNOT WAIT.  If you happen to be going there to, you’ll know it’s me because I’ll be dragging my bum leg behind me.

Oh yes.  This morning my knee swelled up, just begging me to give it its own zip code.  AWESOME.  But I don’t care.  Trish is bringing her Vita-Mix for our room, and there may or may not be wine coolers in my future.

I hope to blog live from the convention.  If you think that the only reason I go is to GET AWAY, HANG OUT WITH GOOD FRIENDS, AND DRINK WINE COOLERS, you would be mistaken.

I’m going to attend all seminars, peruse the exhibitor’s booths (taking great care to avoid The Cart People), and generally remind myself why I homeschool.

The getting away, good friends, jacuzzi, and potential wine coolers are simply incidentals.

That’s my story, and I’m hanging onto it for dear life.

If you are fellow homeschooling Floridians and are going to the convention, leave me a comment letting me know!  I’ll be updating at will.  And if you think about it, pray for Fiddledaddy, who will be wrangling the children.

I certainly hope I don’t accidentally leave my cell phone at home…that would be tragic…  🙂

14 Responses to Escaping the House of Horrors

  • Is THAT what a VitaMix is for? I never knew! I’ll definitely put one on MY wish list!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Well. Technically it’s for all the healthy protein shakes we’re going to make. But should a cocktail or 3 emerge, we won’t complain…

    DeeDee

  • For future knowledge, you can use superglue for cuts like that. It stings, but it’s what they probably would have done at the urgent care/er anyway. You can also use liquid bandage, it’s like superglue light. It doesn’t do so well at holding together, as in a cut that pulls, but it does great for keeping a cut protected from water/germs/etc.

    Have fun at the convention! You’ll be there with many of my friends. A group of us would go together each year and we’d mostly hang out on the big cushion/couch things most of the time. We’d intend to go to the seminars but found ourselves having too much fun to interrupt it with learning. Then we’d go curriculum shopping and peer pressure each other into buying more than we needed. Good times. 🙂 If I had the money this year and didn’t rely on FLVS for the majority of our kids schooling, I’d be there too. I’ll probably go again next year to stock up on the materials we do purchase.

  • Reminds me of my daughter’s two visits to Urgent Care in two days — oldest grandchild with a broken arm and youngest with a knot on her head from a fall. (Would you believe that the middle-child Annie is the one usually getting banged up?) I think that you take the prize, though — you deserve it and a great time at the convention! Annie

  • I will be with you in spirit at the North Carolina Homeschool Convention. I. CAN. NOT. WAIT! This is my favorite time of the year! Better than Christmas : )

    By the way, if you have need of a reading curriculum, visit The Struggling Reader. They are friends of mine from NC and have some excellent products.

    Enjoy your time and beverages!

  • I’m going!!! I CAN NOT WAIT!

    My girlfriend and I are ditching, er I mean leaving our children in capable hands and leaving Thursday morning to make the 30 minute trek to the OUTLET MALL that’s “right there”. It seemed a waste to miss it. heeheehee

    Sounds like a perfect day….outlet mall, vendor hall….ahhhhhh.

    BTW – watch out, I’m one of those “Cart People” this year!!! It’s just a means for me to buy more! 😉

  • I have an index finger without a fingerprint now. 🙂 Mine was a knife…a very sharp knife…a very sharp knife I had just sharpened.

    I’m wishing I homeschooled in Florida about now. Not only because it is blissfully warm there (please do not mention three things…bugs, reptiles and humidity I’m happy in my ignorance).

  • Oh, I am a menace in the kitchen. I’ve started keeping the medical super-glue around–mostly for me but occasionally for the kids.

    Have fun at convention!

  • Poor guys, all of you! I sympathize with Emme. Something in my ears is really small/not quite right and causes my ears not to handle pressure like they should. Which means blowing my nose causes major pain. I’ve been plagued with ear infections my whole life, too. Hope everyone feels better/heals up soon!

    Have fun at your convention/vacation. 🙂

  • LOLOLOLOLOLOL—-I took a while before I was able to compose myself to write a response to your hilarious post. I am sure I will see you there, maybe a couple of times. I will also have a bum knee…twisted it a couple of weeks ago while giving a urine sample at the dr.’s office (don’t ask). Still not better.

    I guess I need to pray for my kids to get ear infections because THEY WON’T BLOW, EITHER!! They ” don’t like the feeling”. I’m guessing they won’t like the feeling of a severe ear infection, either!

    Call me up one night and we can compare notes on seminars (which CDs to buy).

    Karen

  • Enjoy the convention. You’ll be done homeschooling before you know it. I just finished 16 years of homeschooling-Can’t believe we’re done.

  • MY DAUGHTER WON’T BLOW HER NOSE, EITHER! She claims she can’t! I HATE THE SNIFFING. I’ll use your daughter as an example to mine!

  • My thumb is throbbing from sympathy pains.

    And I highly recommend investing in some Nu-Skin, and I don’t normally recommend products with poor grammar/spelling. If it’s EZ, it’s not for me. Anyway, you can find it in the pharmacy (near the bandages) at your local store.

    Enjoy your time away!

  • I’ll be there Thursday, but only for the one night. I have to leave Friday afternoon. Oh well, one day of peace … uh…studious curriculum searching… is better than none.

    And in the evening I will be reviewing books in my room. You will not find me downstairs enjoying being served a quiet, leisurely, overpriced meal for which I have not shopped, cooked, or served.

    Did I see that the hotel offers masages?!! Too bad they are a small fortune…but I feel a stiff neck beginning to surface.

  • I am here-first time and so funny-the cart people are everywhere! Surprised you didn’t hear us in the vendor hall. My tired crying child yelling, “I want you to BUY ME THAT GUN”!!! Good times.