And the last domino to fall

We’re still in the throws of the Great Viral Epidemic of ‘09.  But I wanted to share just a tad more information.  More information than you wanted, I’m sure, but I’m all about full disclosure.

And this will be my last post involving vomit for 2009.  Pinky swear.

After the virus ravaged nearly the entire household, there was one lone holdout.  Emme.  The melodramatic child prone to hypochondria.  I thought she might be spared since she made out her will and I was finding notes to God scattered throughout the house.

“Dear God,
Please don’t let me throw up.
Sincerely, Emme.”

On Sunday night, after a long arduous fluid filled day, we settled in for a nights rest.  At 3 in the morning, I was awakened by a small Emme-like voice at the side of my bed, “mom.”

I knew the intonation in her voice immediately.  The translation was “MOM! I’M ABOUT TO THROW UP ALL OVER YOU AND YOUR TIDY BED!”

With lightning fast speed and agility, which took every last amount of energy I could muster, I flew out of bed and began ushering Emme towards the toilet.

But Emme had a different idea.  She wrongly assumed that if she didn’t actually GO to a toilet, she wouldn’t vomit.  So she stopped dead in her tracks, two feet short of the toilet, placed both hands on the door frame and wouldn’t budge.

Have I mentioned lately that Emme is as tall as I am now, and twice as strong willed?

I had to tackle her to get her through the door jamb, and forcibly bend her at the waist to perfect the aim.

Right in the nick of time.

No more details here.  Suffice it to say that Emme’s reaction to The Virus far surpassed the rest of the family. It would make the annual Christmas letter.  If I had the energy to actually pen a Christmas letter.

Today, we seem to be on the long road to recovery.  And my culinary skills are going to be perfecting The Bland Diet.  Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.  And a special thank you to my Tweeps who held my head hand through all of this.

Have a Merry Christmas my sweet friends!


December 23, 2009

13 Responses to And the last domino to fall

  • Merry Christmas! Oh, the logic of children, IF I don’t go to the toilet … I’m glad it’s mostly past. 🙂 I see cinnamon toast or a Snoopy Thanksgiving for Christmas!

  • My hubby and I also have had a gastro germ over the past few days – had me wondering whether your final child escaped or succumbed. I suppose at least there is nobody left to catch it on Christmas morning!

  • May you bid good riddance to that nasty bug as you kick its butt out the door!! I hope Emme and the rest of you are back to 100% so you can have a Merry, Merry Christmas!!

  • 2010 has to be better than the end of 2009 has been!

    Guess this means you probably won’t have to decide about seeing the movie with the frog and the princess any time soon!

    Merry Christmas!

  • Well at least it’s over now. 😉 No more vomiting until 2010. 🙂

  • My children do the opposite–they hang over the toilet or trash can as if they really wanted to vomit, even when I am sure there can’t possibly be any real vomit there. Sometimes I try to use Emme’s logic on them–if you stop preparing to throw up, and thinking you are going to any minute, maybe you won’t.

  • Nothing like some good ol’ throw up to get a mom moving:) My wonderful son came up with a “word game” after he got sick one time….”How many ways can you say throw up?” This was truly an educational experience.
    1. Throw up
    2. Puke
    3. Hurl
    4. Up Chuck
    5. Toss your cookies
    6. Vomit
    I think he added a few more–they might have been made up.
    Here is to the rest of your holiday season being puke free!!!

  • I hope everyone is feeling better soon!! I hope the kids are better to enjoy Santa’s gifts. And please don’t be offended, I am leaving a can of Lysol on my back porch for Santa, I realllly don’t want the virus of ’09 to visit us.

  • Oh no! Poor Emme! I hope everyone is better now.

  • Here’s hoping you can celebrate the New Year in perfect health.

  • Mine came on Christmas night and I spent all day Saturday in bed feeling quite crappy! No one else is feeling yuck but me. I hope it stops here. Sorry for your Christmas 🙁

  • I think every kid has to go through a few bouts of puking through a hand clamped over the mouth before they finally figure out that if it’s coming up, it’s going out – whether they believe it or not. The only thing the hand does is serve to widen the spray pattern.

    Glad you’re all feeling better now.

  • Oh no! I hope you were able to have a good Christmas despite the puke… 🙁