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Paper Trail

On Thursday, we took the kids on a field trip to Epcot.  Completely ignoring the fact that Florida is having Africa-envy, and the temperature in the shade was a balmy 134 degrees.

We’re adventuresome, if nothing else.

At one point, Jensen’s skin was inflamed because of the heat, so it was determined that he should get wet to cool off.  Since Disney frowns upon throwing children into the water fountain, I let him play in the kid’s water spot.  This is a circular area which has water shooting forth from the ground.  The children can run around, fully clothed in the water, while weary parents can stand under the misters or seat themselves on hard benches.

I chose the bench seating, since mist and humidity cause my unruly hair to take on another zip code.  I brought a change of clothes for Jensen, so I sent him clad only in red pants to frolic in the shooting springs.

I sat poised on the edge of the uncomfortable seat ready to spring into action in case someone should attempt an abduction, or the more likely scenario of Jensen rendering himself naked.

Neither occurred.  A good time at the Disney park, to be sure.  The day was coming to a close when I thought that we were going to escape without incident.

Which would have been rare.

I dodged into the bathroom for one last time before the long voyage home.


I was scrubbing my hands clean as though I was preparing for surgery, when the woman beside me said, “Um, excuse me for touching you, but…”  And with that, she extricated a portion of the paper seat covering from the waistband of my skort.  Horrified, I felt behind me, and indeed, the rest of the seat cover used for the feathering of the nest was tucked into my clothes.  Trailing behind me, like a white fluffy tail.


I thanked her profusely for saving me from certain public humiliation.

Meanwhile, my daughters stood beside me willing the floor to open up beneath them.

I later told Fiddledaddy about the incident, and he was astonished that I hadn’t thought to whip out my camera and ask her to record the event for posterity.  And show and tell.

Frankly, so am I.  I must be slipping.  I blame it on the excessive heat.

I’m going to postpone Saturday Stirrings for a little while.  I’m finding myself a little overwhelmed with life, and underwhelmed by my culinary skills.  It will be back in the near future.  Meanwhile, I’m going to steer clear of public restrooms for awhile.  Or pack some spray adhesive to keep the seat cover where it belongs.

Undoubtedly, I will eventually end up on the evening news.

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!


8 Responses to Paper Trail

  • Send some of that heat North, would you? Chicago is too cold for my liking.

  • I can’t begin to tell you how wonderful it is to come to your blog and read about your escapades. It makes me feel better about my toilet paper injuries and bears pooping on my lawn.

  • You cover the seat. You’re so cute…

  • I used to read your blog all the time and then life happened. I was thrilled to see you’re still here!!
    Thanks for the smiles!

  • I love that your husband so GETS and SUPPORTS your bloggy endeavors by suggesting embarassing photographs that will live forever online, and is willing to take it for that team. The kids will come around. (Glad you had a good time!)

  • DeeDee–I have been sick all week with ebola or its very close kin. My head has ached, I have willed myself to succumb to the death that surely awaits at the end of whatever this is. I have not laughed all week. Until now. Thank you so much. To clarify, I am very much laughing WITH you, not at you.

  • NICE.

    Everytime I read about one of these episodes, I am more convinced that you and I would be fast friends. =)

  • Thank GOD for women like that! She saved you from much, much worse!