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Notes from the Linoleum

I realize I’ve been scarce.  And weird.  More weird than usual.  So an excuse explanation is eminent.

You know how I talked about wanting to get into better shape around the first part of every year since I started blogging 3 years ago?  And then you don’t hear anything more from me on the subject?

It’s usually because I’ve fallen on my face and pretend I never talked about it in the first place, because avoidance?  It is a gift.

Well.  Out of desperation, Fiddledaddy and I went on the South Beach diet.  Phase 1.  For two of the longest weeks of my entire life.

I’m not kidding.

I wanted to die.

We did South Beach about 6 years ago, after I had Cailey.  And we enjoyed great success with it.  But honestly, I do not remember it being that hard.  I think that’s because I didn’t have 3 children, wasn’t homeschooling, and I was, you know, younger.

But I knew something drastic had to happen because for the last few months, I couldn’t get control of the cravings.  I would work out like a maniac, but then sit down and devour an entire bag of tortilla chips.

And call it carb loading.

And my sweet tooth?  It ruled my entire being.  Phase 1 of South Beach is about eliminating sugar and carbs, to get the cravings under control.  And people, the detox?  It wasn’t pretty.

Which has accounted for a good deal of my surly disposition lately.  And for sport, I timed the whole thing perfectly so that I enjoyed a round of menstruation during the ordeal.  Had cramps that would have crippled any ordinary man.  AWESOME.

We thankfully finished Phase 1 last weekend, and I didn’t cheat once.

I just prayed for death to come swiftly.

After all was said and done, I lost 8 pounds in those 2 weeks.  And the cravings?  I’m happy to report that I walked through Sam’s Club today, and SAMPLED NOTHING!  Not even the sheet cake.  And I was okay with that.

Before the detox, I would have not only sampled the cake, but disguised my appearance so that I could wander by and sample it 7 or 34 more times.

The weight loss will slow down to about 2 pounds a week now, and I have about 10 pounds to go.  I know how to low-carb meals, so I can thankfully go back to using e-Mealz meal planning (see left sidebar).  I’ve missed it.  Adding in more recipes to Phase 2 is essential to success.

Because I have a short attention span.

On Monday morning, I enjoyed my first complex carb in the form of a plate of Oatmeal Pancakes.  My joy was obvious.  And a happy mom, means a happy household.  My children are happy to have Nice Mommy back.

I’ll keep you updated.  Even if I’m face down on the linoleum.


14 Responses to Notes from the Linoleum

  • I did the South Beach once. It nearly killed me too! But maybe, just maybe I’ll consider doing it again. NAH!

  • I’m really considering South Beach. And I’m going to start. As soon as I remember to forget to buy chocolate chips.

  • Good for you!! I just started my secret plan today. I snuck(sp?) out of the house while daddy and kiddos were sleeping and walked, so nice! Now to be good with food today. I’m determined this time and I’m going to keep it a secret from my hubby see if he notices a difference!

  • Oh how funny! Several of my friends and I started this Sacred Heart diet (which is basically a no carb/no sugar diet) on Monday. It is Wed., and I think I have been like a grizzly bear ever since we started. I had to do something, though. I have only slipped and had two diet dr. peppers. Yesterday, I considered quitting about ten times. Every time I opened the fridge and saw the homemade choc. chip cookies I had made for my fam. They are my fav.
    BUT a girl has gotta do it. I am holding on to 2 Timothy 1:7, self-discipline has never been easy for me in eating or money! We can do this! Cranky or not!

  • We must be sisters separated at birth. To add to that agony, I haven’t had a Diet Coke, Diet Mt Dew of Diet Dr Pepper for 4 weeks now. 4. count’em. 4. The sad thing is, the aspartame, it’s in low fat yogurt and most other low-fat/low-sugar foods. You just caint have nuthin’!

  • First of all… when “Aunt Flo” comes to call, most people want to eat the side of the house… so I can’t imagine doing Phase I of SB at that time! You’re a ROCK!

    Several years ago I tried SB and lost a bunch in Phase I and gained during Phase II. Then in 2004 I started Body For Life and was very successful, but for the last few years I’ve struggled with keeping off about 10-15 pounds no matter how hard I work out or what I do nutritionally.

    This June 8, I started Weight Watchers (eating basic BFL and counting in it points – I know, I know) and so far, I’ve lost 10 pounds in 6 weeks. That’s the most I’ve lost in about 3 or 4 years. I’m not obsessing about totally balancing prot/carbs, etc. Just trying to eat some protein and any mix of veggies/carbs with my meals (mostly 4 times a day).

    Good luck with Phase II.

  • I can’t do South Beach Phase 1 because of blood sugar issues, but I’ve found two things that do work for me … after MANY years of struggling.

    This first is … (don’t groan) … regular EXERCISE. And the very best EVER is Leslie Sansone’s Walk at Home DVD’s. She awesome, upbeat and inspiring … and you do strength training AND cardio at the same time … AT HOME in front of the TV. You don’t have to go to a gym and can work it into your scheduled whenever. And all the exercising is to music which is motivating for me. Check out her website: http://www.walkathome.com.

    The next is … (get excited here) … CHOCOLATE. Yes, I said chocolate. Healthy, dark chocolate that has antioxidents and lot’s of other good things. Since I’ve been eating three squares of Xocai chocolate a day I’ve lost 15 pounds, have increased energy, appetite is stable (and sometimes I have to make myself eat ’cause I’m not interested in food at all), my joints feel better and the “stray grays” in my hair are disappearing. I’m NOT exaggerating … this stuff, while expensive, is AWESOME. If I do want something sweet after a meal I square of dark chocolate satisfies me. For more info the website is http://www.mxicorp.com (this is a “home-based business, make big bucks” deal … but if you can bypass all that hype the actual product is incredible).

    Just wanted to share my success … ’cause I’ve struggled and struggled the same as everyone here.

  • Wow! Congratulations on your accomplishment!! I did the Zone Diet after my third child, and the first week is detox as well. I did it and lost a ton.

    And think of it fondly.

    I’ve tried since Child 4 entered the world, but I just can’t go for 10 days without chocolate. I have a serious addiction.

    But maybe you’ll be my inspiration and I’ll give the Sonoma Diet detox a whirl. Not today, though, because I have brownies in the oven and leftover licorice movie contraband in the pantry.

  • I did the South Beach a couple years ago and I thought I was on death’s door. I had migraine headaches for THREE WEEKS!! I stayed on it for an additional week because I had only lost four pounds in the first two weeks…
    Grand total~lost 5 lbs and consumed a Costco sized bottle of Motrin…

    BUT I am so proud of YOU for doing so well!!!

  • Wow!! 8 pounds in 2 weeks is AWESOME! Maybe I need to do South Beach for a couple of weeks to boost my metabolism and get me to lose it a little faster….I’ve lost 22.3 pounds in almost 4 months, so that’s not bad, but I have ALOT to go still!!

  • Hi DeeDee,

    I’m following you from Mom Bloggers Club and I’m hooked. What happy carbs will you have next ;->

    • I have to tell y’all that Fiddledaddy got me some South Beach chocolate covered soy nuts. I think I’m going to live!

  • Wow! Awesome!! That is amazing. It’s nice that your hubby is doing it with you. For the support and all.
    I, on the other hand, had an Ale House cheeseburger, fries and a Captain Jack’s buried treasure for dessert tonight. In one sitting. I’ll be detoxing tomorrow. Actually I’m starting right now!

  • ok I found it! Have you ever ventured to the South Beach Diet message board form? Fab recipes and lots of support. They helped me so much. The 1st time I did SBD I lost 18 lbs. in Phase 1. But I was extremely strict and diligent in my exercise. The last pic I saw of you you had looked great, it was when you were going to the gym at dark thirty in the morning. ;O) I know what you mean about those chips. Kettle Chips were my downfall. Now I call them poison. I can’t have them anymore!