We spent an impromptu day at Disney Worlds Animal Kingdom. The children called it a field trip. I called it an escape from the mountain of laundry that stubbornly refuses to fold itself.
The children have a favorite ride. It’s known as the Kali River Rapids, and involves hurtling down a raging river toward certain death, while strapped into what amounts to an oversized inter tube.
And to make it extra exciting, two riders are seated together and share a common lap style seatbelt. So, it is possible to be heading over, say, a tumultuous waterfall, while at the same time, your 4 year old son decides to release the seatbelt buckle.
Because he can.
Which is why I refuse to ever sit by him. Besides, Fiddledaddy is a far better swimmer than I am. And he looks good wet.
I do not.
And for that reason, I will risk public mocking from my family, and wear my big black shirt over my head during the dampening parts of the ride.
That black blob in the bottom of the photograph? That would be me.
And btw, the big black shirt is an awesome fashion accessory on a hot and balmy Florida day. What with it sucking up all the heat from the sun.
My efforts were in vain, as when I emerged, I was drenched. My bangs were plastered to my face, while the rest of my hair did its best Rosanne Rosannadana impression.
And while we were in the 50 minute line, waiting to get soaked from a 5 minute ride, Fiddledaddy pointed this out to me.
I have to give some unexpected props to my Emme. She rode “Expedition Everest.” Twice. “Expedition Everest” is the type of roller coaster that before climbing aboard, will make you cross yourself if you’re Catholic. Or if you use to be Catholic. Or if you’ve ever known a Catholic.
If you’ll recall, Emme is the child who just a few short months ago cried like a little girl on Mickey’s Toon Town roller coaster. The one made for the preschool set.
At last, I have birthed a roller coaster riding buddy. Someone to share my barf bag with. Oh happy day.
Alas, I’m back to reality, and a must reacquaint the bleach and bowl brush with a certain little boy’s toilet.
Or. I could just push for another impromptu field trip.
“Always put off for tomorrow, what you should have done yesterday.”