Our vacation was scheduled in December, and I checked off my to-do list, item by item. All done in the week prior to the beginning of the vacation.
Because always put off for tomorrow, those things that should have been done last month, I always say.
The very last item on the list (besides stocking up on Extra Strength Excedrin) was having our mail stopped. This would include a trip to the post office.
Which to me is like planning a stop in hell. Something to be avoided.
And with good reason.
Our local post office has had more than one instance of elderly patrons confusing the brake pedal with the gas pedal, and these errant roadsters have attempted to install a drive-thru single handedly. And thusly ending up in the waiting line inside the post office. While still strapped in to the drivers seat.
And, by some miracle, no one has yet to be killed.
After this happened a few times, our intrepid post office installed little yellow poles in front of the handicapped parking spaces. Located right in front of the post office. Where our elderly patrons are most likely to park.
I’ve seen these yellow poles. And I’ve seen the 3 ton cadillacs that the geriatric set drive.
My money is on the car. The pole doesn’t stand a chance. As evidenced by the miriad of car paint already bespeckling them.
So I prefer to avoid the post office altogether, especially with my 3 young children in tow.
In a panic, I announced to Fiddledaddy that I still needed to have the mail stopped before we could leave town. And asked for prayer as I picked up my keys to go.
“Hold on!” He announced as he sat down at his computer.
”This is no time to go surfing, man! Start praying that I survive the trip!”
Before I knew it he had discovered that you can have your mail stopped WITH THE CLICK OF A MOUSE! AND YOU DON’T EVEN HAVE TO LEAVE THE SAFETY OF YOUR HOUSE.
I’m a poet. And didn’t know it.
That’s right, I need never fear being mowed down by a fender in the post office ever again.
But I have to say, a drive-thru post office is not a bad idea. These older folks may be onto something.