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When Good Appliances Go Bad

Not long after Fiddledaddy moved me to Hurricane Alley, Florida, I had a recurrent dream that haunted me. I dreamed that a tornado was eminent, and my only concern was saving my appliances.

This was before we had children, of course.

Now the children would be my priority. Right after the coffee maker.

And interestingly, the same weekend that we moved into our newly built house, a hurricane was due to strike. A hurricane of such magnitude that even the alligators were packing their bags and leaving the state.

I was great with my first child, and although I wanted to stay and protect my brand new appliances, Fiddledaddy evacuated us further inland. Fortunately, Floyd took a last minute turn, and our home and appliances were spared.

Then, in 2004, I was again huge with child. This time it was Jensen. (The boy child, not the hurricane.) And we were pummeled by not one, but two hurricanes. Two weeks apart. This time we stayed, because evacuating would mean spending 8 hours stuck in traffic. With no rest stop in sight. And with two young children, and a pregnant wife who already has bladder issues, it was decided we would hunker down, and brave the storm.

Again, the appliances and my growing family were spared.

Now, after we’ve been in our house for nearly 10 years, my precious appliances are all dying off. One by one. First it was the dryer. Which in truth, was murdered. When it began to sound like it was powered by a rodent on a wheel, someone (who shall remain nameless) thought he would save a couple of dollars and repair it himself. A can of WD-40 later, the squeak was indeed gone, but the smoke and stench that came pouring forth was a cause for concern.

Enter a new dryer.

Then the dishwasher began retaining water. I had little sympathy. GET IN LINE. And since I’ve hated that dishwasher that sounds like a 747 taking off out of my kitchen every night, I said GOOD RIDDANCE.

Enter a new and improved dishwasher. Which receives a standing ovation from me every morning when I open it to retrieve my extra large coffee mug from the top shelf. Because that’s where it fits. An extra large Disney coffee mug should never be relegated to the bottom shelf just because it’s too large. That was just wrong.

Then, last weekend, the washing machine stopped agitating. For no good reason. Which agitated me. Because the thought of going to the laundry mat with 3 rambunctious children, 35 loads of laundry, and one enormous tension headache was enough to send me away to a nice padded cell for a little R&R.

I was none to crazy about a visit to Lowes with 3 children either.

Fiddledaddy, who is far more progressive than I, suggested that I order a washing machine on-line.

I’ll pause to let that sink in.

Order a major appliance on-line. Without ever seeing it? Or kicking the tires? Unheard of.

But, as he pointed out, I knew all the features that I was looking for, the size, and even the brand. So, on Monday, after agonizing online for about, oh, two minutes, I pressed “add to cart.”


Tuesday morning, I was awakened by Emme who stage whispered, “MOM, Lowes just called, and they are delivering the washing machine at 9:21.”


“Um, I think that’s what he said.”

I called Lowes to ascertain whether this was 9:21 the time, or 9-21, the date. While they were uncertain about the time, they told me that the deliveries had already left, and I was scheduled to receive the washing machine that day.

The truck pulled up at 9:21. With my beautiful new washing machine. And people, washing machines have come a long way in the last 10 years. This one has a feature called “hydrowave” which gently massages my clothes clean.

I’m considering climbing into the thing, to see if the new washing machine will double as a jacuzzi.

Which come to think of it, may be just the appliance I really need. Since hurricane season is already upon us, that may be the best way to relieve all the stress and worry.

And get clean at the same time.

Brilliant. The patent is pending, y’all.

23 Responses to When Good Appliances Go Bad

  • I keep hoping my dishwasher will die, since I hate it so very much. It was here when we moved in, and my wonderfully frugal husband doesn’t think strong dislike is a good enough reason to replace it. So I keep hoping it will just give up and quit working. I even have my next one all picked out, so I could order on line that very day. 🙂

    I hope hurricane season isn’t bad this year, and that your new appliances (and, of course, your children) remain perfectly safe.

  • We were going through that last year. Our aged appliances were leaving their earthly coil… and going en masse! (A problem I obviously didn’t foresee, as I purchased all my appliances together!) As I see it, we are in a new houes, with another batch of new appliances, and we should start the 10-year count down now…

  • i am with you on saving the appliances…ours are all brand new as of 05, but the kids…right now i would donate them for hurricane experiments…LOL they have been up since 5 30 and are attempting to start WW 3 on the sofa….UGGGHHHHH

  • I am in want of a new washing machine. I want a front loader.

    Alas, my 10 year old washing machine is still going strong…..sigh.

  • Enjoy your new washer! We don’t really have the money to replace ours, but I still secretly hope it’ll die. 🙂

  • I am a pioneer woman on the northern plains. The kind you read about in Lauraine Snelling’s Red River books. I have no dishwasher. How do I survive, you ask? Well, it helps if I don’t cook.

  • Dee Dee….you did try to find out what was the matter with your old washer first didn’t you? There are several really inexpensive reasons why the washer won’t agitate,,,,,I’m thinkin’ you did, but it takes away from the flow of your story! The appliance man’s daughter in me is always trying to get people to fix first buy later!

  • Oh my heavens, girl, that was just the laugh I needed to start my day off! You will have to let us know how the whole washer/jacuzzi thing works.

  • New appliances are God’s gift to women, but I was distracted by the mention of your extra large Disney coffee mug. I have Grumpy and Eeyore. Best. Coffee. Mugs. Ever.

  • I hear the spin cycle stops when you open the lid. [Calvin and Hobbes, anyone?]

    It is impressive that Lowes showed up at 9:21. Very impressive.


  • so funny. My husband sells appliances for custom homes and he actually has replaced our new appliances ( our house is only 3 Years old) with newer better ones for a fraction of the cost. I never knew that such good stuff was out their. I am cheap person at heart so it was hard to take when he took the dishwasher out, but when he replaced it with some European model I was in heaven. I truly never have to prewash anything and it runs as loudly as someone humming softly. I am eagerly waiting for my new stove.

  • Ha! Love it. I recently purchased a new washer and dryer from Lowes as well – LOVE them. I no longer have to bend over to take my clothes out of the dryer – a big deal when you’re almost 6 ft tall!

  • If that ever happens again, the agitator quits, lots of times that can be fixed with a pack of little plastic doo-dads called “agitator dogs” that cost about $3.00. Of course, you have to get a “trained professional” to install the $3. dogs for $75.00. Just sayin.

  • You got a new washer in a DAY? That’s amazing.

    Keep us posted on how your “Hurricane Tub” goes.

  • thoushaltnotenvy…thoushaltnotenvy… yes, I’m repeating that as I read your post… sigh… hope you don’t mind if I live vicariously through you as I kick our dishwasher on my way out the door!

  • New reader to your blog, I loved the post. Was it a front loader? I could tell my own story about how I ended up getting my own new washer for free. They gave me my money back and told me to keep the washer. Here’s hoping your eperience with your new washer turns out better than mine. If not, at least you have the option of turning yours into a Jacuzzi.

  • Wow. Very impressed with the accurate 9:21 delivery estimate. Go Lowes!

  • I’m in the process of writing a similar post. This month our A/C died, washing machine, microwave and the dishwasher is acting a little flakey. And by the way, the washing machine I got from Lowes 13 months ago. Came with a 12 month warranty.

  • Don’t you just love new washing machines! We got a new on back in the spring I just love it!

  • I keep hoping that my dishwasher will die. It is now 16 years old and so loud. Does anybody know of a hit man for unwanted appliances?

    When it does finally die, my husband promised that I could replace all of the appliances with stainless. I hope that will be soon.

  • I never thought about appliances much but I will not part with my new HUGE LG washer and dryer. The house can go, but the washer and dryer must go with me. This is the one appliance that can change your world. I no longer dread laundry day (it is only one or two days a week now for 3 kids, me and hubby) since I do three loads at a time. Heck, it is even worth getting one for Christmas, birthday, etc all combined. It is so big you could probably put your kids in it to ride out a hurricane LOL……

  • We just moved into our home a year ago and the stove and fridge came with it. The stove had a tiny little buzz (sounded like a fly) where the clock is. Over the year it got louder until the clock alram/timer went on and could NOT be turned off! Hubby had to take the wire out to make it stop! LOL